"Journaling: A Dialogue of Love"

         Because God is love, He desires to share His Heart with each of us. One of the realities of true love is that love desires to communicate. A true, healthy relationship with God grows through communication. It's through speaking with and listening to God--a dialogue of two hearts (God's Heart and ours) that an intimate relationship forms. Prayer is a relationship between God's Heart and our heart. It's through our relationship with God that we receive the truth of our identity. God so desires that we become one with Him. He wants each of us to become one with His Heart, His desires, His priorities and His purpose. God loves each of us more than we love ourselves. He desires each of us more than we desire Him. He wants a deep, intimate relationship with each of us more than we want a relationship with Him. These truths reflect only a fraction of how much God loves each of us. 

         Journaling is a way or method of communicating with God, a way of sharing with God the inner movements of our hearts--such as our feelings, desires, and thoughts--and hearing back from God. Journaling is a way of making visible through writing the dialogue of prayer that is taking place between God and each of us. Because it is written down, our journaling helps us to remember what God has spoken to us.

         Journaling is not the same as keeping a diary. Rather, with journaling we are conscious of writing a letter to God, sharing our heart thoughts with God. Journaling is intended to be a dialogue; for, a true personal relationship with God should be conversational (a dialogue of two hearts). Journaling is also a discipline--a daily discipline--that we need to pray for. We need a grace of desire to want to journal with God everyday as part of our relationship with Him: "Morning after morning he opens my ear that I may hear" (Is. 50:4). Journaling is an act of faith in that after we write a letter to God, we trust in the truth that God is with us, and we write what we sense God is saying back to us. We should begin a time of journaling with a short prayer asking the Holy Spirit to overshadow us and lead us. A prayer can be simple such as, "Holy Spirit I ask that you overshadow me, lead me and guide me during this time of journaling. Help me to truly hear from you."

         We use the sacred scriptures, the bible, in order to learn how to journal because God's "word is truth" (John 17:17), and the word of God is already God's communication to us--His message of personal love for each of us. The word of God puts us in contact with God, Himself. God's words "are Spirit and life" (John 6:63). A new season of conversion and spiritual renewal always begins with the word of God: "In the beginning was the Word" (John 1:1); and, God's word is living and effective" (Heb. 4:12); it is "a lamp for my feet, a light for my path" (Psalm 119:105). We can dialogue with God through His word. The word is meant to be internalized. We can allow the word of God to penetrate into our hearts--spoken by the God who loves us. Remember, He really does love each of us! 'Those who welcome the Word as the "guest" of their hearts will have abiding joy' (Liturgy of the Hours, vol. 3, p. 707). 

         For example, in The Book of the Prophet Jeremiah, chapter 29:11, God says: "For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare, not for woe! Plans to give you a future full of hope." We might respond to God by asking a simple question (we ask one question at a time) such as, "Father (or Jesus, Holy Spirit, or Mary), what kind of future of hope do you want for me?" Then, we listen interiorly with our heart: "Listen that you may have life" (Is. 55:3). Then, we begin to write what we sense God may be saying to answer our question. Some of us may struggle at first with our ability to get in touch with our hearts (and the feelings and language of the heart). If this is so, remember that athletes do stretches and warm up exercises before they begin to exercise. One way that may help us to begin to get in touch with our feelings is to write in our journal, "Father (or Jesus, Holy Spirit, or Mary), today I am most grateful for___________,and this is why"; or, "Father (or Jesus, Holy Spirit, or Mary), today I am least grateful for ____________, and this is why". These little exercises can help to free up our hearts so that we can express ourselves more easily to God in our journals.

         There may be times when we simply desire to share with God a joy or a personal hurt in our journals. Again, we begin with a  short prayer asking the Holy Spirit to lead and guide us. We can write a letter to God from our hearts and wait expectantly, listening for His response. Journaling can be a powerful tool to use for inner healing as well. We can share with the Lord strong, negative feelings of anger, rejection, a disappointment, or a struggle we are having with someone or some situation in our life. We can share with God feelings that we find hard to express with other people. We can even share a frustration or a disappointment that we may have with God, Himself--such as, "God, why did you allow this to happen to me? Where were you when this was happening in my life?" Don't be afraid to journal out any of your negative, wounded emotions.

         Especially in the beginning when we are learning to journal, there can be any number of blocks that prevent us from journaling: Lies, fears, unbelief. Here are a few of them:

     --"I don't believe that journaling is really possible. God doesn't speak to us personally like this."; or, "Why would God want to speak to me? I don't believe that God can really be that interested enough in me to want to speak to me so personally."; or, "I don't believe that God can love me so personally."; or, "I don't believe that I can hear from God."; or, "I don't believe that this is really God speaking to me--it has to be my own imagination."

-      "I can't get in touch with my feelings."

-      "I don't feel like journaling. I can't discipline myself to want to journal."

-      "I'm afraid to expose my heart so vulnerably to God."

-      "There's just too much pain within me. There's just too many painful memories within me. I'm afraid to go there in my heart."

-      "I've done too many bad things in my life that I am ashamed of, and  I believe that they are unforgivable. I can't risk sharing them with God."

If any of these fears, lies or postures of unbelief resonate with you, you can simply ask God for the grace to move beyond where you are within, and take a risk with expectant faith to begin to write.